Tween Hair Blog Too Good Not to Share

My oldest daughter is entering a new age; an age in which she is more interested in her looks form her shoes to the bows in her hair. This new age is called tweendom, and it's already got me confused.

And when you're confused, don't you turn to the internet for answers? I know I'm not the only one. That's when I stumbled upon TweenyHair.

The blog is too good not to share. This blog is written by an average mom (not someone with a background as a hair stylist). She just happens to have a bi-racial daughter with very long, thick, beautiful hair, and she has been determined to put the effort into styling her daughter's hair in interesting ways that won't cause undue damage. No chemicals. Her ideas are inventive and the results are impressive. She gives all her instructions via written word (as far as I have seen) -- no video. She's my new hair hero.

Unfortunately Syd, the mom, stopped blogging in November 2012. As all little girls do, her daughter grew up and has so many interests that she doesn't want to spend as much time on some of the more elaborate styles her mother honed. She's also taken on more of the responsibility of doing her own hair. I can dream!

I Might Need a Little More Than "Patience..."

This week I've been having a lot of ups and downs with my hair. Should I get it trimmed? Should I try twists again? Should I cut it all off and start again? Should I get another texturizer? The questions have been many, and I don't have any answers.

This new video from Chescaleigh may not have solved any of my hair problems, but it did make me laugh and look at things from a different perspective. Maybe you can enjoy it too...

All Things in Moderation

My first video entry. It's a learning process.
Moderation

She's a Shero for Sure! Viola Davis Talks about Coming Out and Creating Her Own Path in Hollywood.

It's great to see how Viola Davis has grown to love herself, as she says in this article in the Houston Chronicle. It just goes to show the overwhelming power of self-doubt and negative thinking. Someone and beautiful and talented as she is...

And to hear that she's going to bring Barbara Jordan's life to screen is just as exciting. 

Viola Davis to take on Barbara Jordan role

Continuous Transition

What's the point of this natural hair journey?

When will I reach my destination?

When will I really feel like I know my hair?

Although I am very comfortable with my new 'do, I can't help but wonder "What's next?"

Sometimes I see another black woman with natural hair, and I think to myself, "I can't wait until my hair is her length." Before I realize it, I'm asking myself how long it took her to grow her hair to that length. 

I can't even ask myself if it's about the journey or the destination, because I don't know the destination. When do I wake up and feel like I'm there? I'm not there yet. I feel like I'm still transitioning.

Struggling with Sameness

Of all the challenges I expected to face in my natural hair journey, boredom didn't make the list. But here I am, three months after the big chop, and every day has seen the same with this hair. Eighty-three days of teeny weeny Afros.

In fashion and retail, this is the time of year when winter lines are moved out and spring lines make their debut. Change is in the air! Change is not in my hair. 

I like having options. I like trying new looks with my clothes, make up, jewelry and hair. I'm not really sure how I should feel or what I should do about it, because I wasn't prepared for this kind of doubt. I prepared myself for external pressures. I prepared myself for the ardent quest to find the "perfect" products for my hair.

The Internet is full of ideas for natural hair styles, right? Sure, the Internet is full of hair tutorials. Have I ever mentioned how inept I've always been at styling my own hair. Tutorials for bantu knots, twits, and the like are my DIY nightmare. 

If I'm being honest with myself, I would admit that my dilemma could stem from unrealistic expectations I had about this journey at the onset. Although I knew that I would have to become acquainted with my natural hair texture over time, underneath it all I guess I expected my hair to be more manageable than it is right now. I didn't expect to have trouble keeping it moisturized throughout the day. I didn't expect that my headbands would give me headaches (at least the cute ones do).

The best I can do right now is just think about where I am in my journey. What have I learned in the last three months? What am I looking forward to? What do I do now?

I am Your Frobassador!

When I'm painting a picture of myself that I want people to believe, I say that I started this blog to share my natural hair journey and possibly inspire others. How spiritual of me!

If I am being totally honest, I have to admit that another (possibly greater reason) I started this blog was to make myself accountable to others and follow through on the journey once I began it. In the beginning, I wasn't sure I was cut out for this. I wasn't sure I was ready to accept the unknown. But, hear I am several months after beginning the journey and more than two months after the big chop.

And I find it interesting how many other people find my hair interesting.

November 2011

I have become an ambassador of the Afro Nation - or Frobassador, for short. While people won't stare at my hair, I do find that my hair quickly becomes a topic of conversation when I meet someone new or run into a friend I haven't seen in a while. People want to know what it's like in my country where natural hair runs wild and free (at least metaphorically). How does one apply for permanent residency? Do you have to renounce your citizenship in Processed Hair Land?

Talking is one of the things I do best, and I never mind talking about what's going on in my life so I am happy to talk about my hair. It's interesting that people are more interesting in my hair now than they were when I relaxed it. The natural is novel. The processed is commonplace and, therefore less interesting. Even though I out more effort into my relaxed hair. When my hair was relaxed, I will admit, it usually looked pretty good. But it looked like so many other heads of hair. In it's natural state, there is no other hair like MY hair. And everyday, it's a little bit different.

So when people ask about my hair (How long have you worn it this way? How long does it take to style in the morning? Do you think you'll ever go back to relaxers?) and even touch my lovey lady locs, I'm happy to share. My hair is different, but not so different from anyone elses' hair. It's made from the same proteins and minerals. It's just has a different directive. It's nothing to fear.

I was fortunate to have to Frobassadors inspire me to take a leap: my sister Mary Dedeaux-Swinton and a dear friend Tosca Davis. Whether it's about hair or some other "great unknown," I hope I can inspire someone else to talk a flying leap!

Happy to be nappy!

Did She Go There Already?!

Shock! Panic! Horror!

At 37 years old, I've just been through the amazing process of rediscovering my natural hair. You can't imagine what I felt tonight when my nine year old daughter tells me that she would like to try wearing her hair straight.

Before I went through this process, there were times I contemplated getting her hair texturized -- which is to say "slightly relaxed" -- a "kiddy perm" to make it easier to manage. I remember what it was like to be her age and to dread combing through my hair after having it washed. I've tried to make the experience easier for her. At the same time, she's my child and I want to protect her.

My rational mind knows this is a minor issue. It's only hair. It's normal for her to want to try something new; especially having seen me for years with relaxed straightened hair.

The idea seems a little less horrifying now that she's asleep and I've had some time to think about it. We could try straightening her hair for a special occasion. She's due for a trim soon.

She did make an important distinction: she would like to try straightening her hair -- not relaxing it.